Posted by jen on January 11, 2002 at 08:23:21:
In Reply to: Re: i hate my life!!! please respond 2 this message as soon as u see it... posted by alyssa on January 03, 2002 at 18:31:30:
for a long time i felt like life wasnt worth living, i was 15 and i just couldnt see the point, everything was boring or depressing, nobody loved me. then i met this boy, and i liked him, i had my first kiss and we saw each other nearly everyday for 3 months, i was doing exams at the time and he's the only reason i got through them without major damage, then he dumped me and i just went into this pit, i sat under my desk and cried in the dark for like 2 months straight, i lost a fifth of my body weight and i didnt want to live.
i was 'self-harming' at the time, thats such a stupid expression, when i cut myself i felt so much better, ididnt like me and no-one else did, ive always been alone. when i saw the blood i felt better, i cant eexplain it. anway it was christmas 3 years ago and i was chatting in the net rooms alot! and having friends there just helped sooo much even if they were a bit crap sometimes, they helped me see what was important. im nearly 20 now and thats getting old and i can see now that some of it was the raging hormones, its what u mistake at the time for super sensitivity to every nuance of every situation.
remember u have 2 like ureself to b liked by others, except on the net. do things that make u happy, write, read, draw-- but its all pretty much up to u. i havent self-harmed since that christmas and it wasnt cos my family threatened me with the mental institution and sectioning!
love you guys